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People with wrong ideas

Participating in the same sex marriage debate has forced me to confront this question: what shall I call the people on the opposite side of this issue? I try not to call people my opponents or my enemies. When I am writing, I can put in the whole description: “those who oppose natural marriage” or “people who advocate same sex marriage,” or depending on the issue, “sex law radicals.” But these are long and awkward locutions, not easy to use in ordinary conversation.

While I was on the Summer for Marriage Bus Tour, I encountered some of these folks who came to oppose us. As I was watching the counter-rallies marching toward us in Albany, NY and especially in Providence, RI, the term that came to mind was simply: The Bad Guys. But that’s a term from a grade B Hollywood movie, unworthy of a Christian mind.

The counter-rallies made it clear too, that the disagreements run deeply and the potential for violence is genuine. I have been reading Rene Girard’s books this summer, Violence and the Sacred, and Things Hidden Since the Foundation of the World. Girard and his followers like Gil Bailie, make it clear that the escalation of hostilities into irrationality and violence is an ever-present possibility. We are capable of seeing our fellow humans as not fully human. We can go back and forth with self-justifying hostilities, until the original cause of the rivalry fades in importance, and nothing remains but the rival himself or herself. In other words, we can easily forget what we are fighting about, and remember only that we are fighting, and whom we are fighting.

I can feel this happening as I recall the rallies and counter-rallies, and as I look around the blogs and watch people’s description of what took place, watch the justifications and rationalizations. We could very easily leave the realm of the rational and descend into madness. In fact, I believe some people already have.

I don’t care which side of the issue you are on: you can’t want that. I can’t believe that of you. I know that I do not want the capitulation of my opponents, simply because my side overwhelms them with numbers. I want them to be converted, to have a genuine change of heart. And if they do not change their views, I hope that we can live together respectfully.

Which brings me back to the original question: what to call people?

We hear the term “peeps” to refer to “people.” When somebody says “our peeps” they mean people on their side of some issue or other. But I feel like everyone who comes over to the Ruth blog are “my peeps:” the people who agree with my views and support my arguments are obviously “my peeps.” But so are the people who don’t agree with me. I have a certain affection for nerdy girl and Heidi, and I think some of you do as well. I don’t agree with them, but I wish them no evil. They have come over here to engage with me and my friends and I feel responsible for them.

So here is what I’m going to call people: Peepwis. That stands for People with Wrong Ideas. “Peepwis” has the affectionate connotation of “peeps” and it keeps the emphasis on ideas. We disagree with one another’s ideas, while still recognizing each other’s personhood. It may sound a little harsh to assert that other people have “wrong” ideas. But honestly, that is what we each think. I think some of you are deeply mistaken. I believe it is far better to face that honestly and allow the discussion to be about the truth or falsehood of our ideas. The worthiness of each of us as persons should never be called into question, no matter how mistaken our ideas may prove to be.

Besides, “Peepwis” is far better than some of the things people are calling each other on blogs and in person. Please notice: the name-calling hides our common humanity. When we call someone a dehumanized name, we are giving ourselves permission to treat them as less than human.

Each and every person who has ever lived is a child of God, beloved by God. God wants each and every one of us to be happy with Him forever. Our choices determine whether we will achieve that happiness in heaven. And some of us believe that wrong ideas will, sooner or later, make us miserable even in this life.

We are not opposed to people. We are opposed to a set of ideas. The people who hold those ideas are deserving of our respect, and yes, our love. Those of us who are Christians believe that this is what we are called as Christians to do. We are to love our enemies, which to say we must recall the humanity even of people whose ideas are wrong, and at complete odds with every aspect of the Christian worldview.

This is the white hot glowing core of the radical Christian message.

So, welcome to all the Peepwis. We love you and pray for you, even while we debate with you and argue with you.

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