by Faith Hakesley on September 17, 2019
Are you tired of hearing about the Catholic Church sexual abuse crisis yet? Speaking as a survivor of sexual abuse by a priest, I’m sure tired of it. Believe me, some days I just want to snap my fingers and make all of the chaos disappear!
Each of the victims who met privately with Pope Benedict XVI in 2008 during his visit to Washington, DC, was given a copy of the book of names presented to the Holy Father. This book contains 1,500 names of victims of clerical abuse in the Archdiocese of Boston. There is also a blank page dedicated to those individuals who never came forward.
Here’s the thing, though: as painful as corruption is to face, we can’t brush it off like “yesterday’s news.” When the Boston Globe’s Spotlight Team brought the issue of sexual abuse of minors out into the open in 2002, few people realized that they had uncovered just the tip of the iceberg. At that time, I was in the midst of preparing to face my own rapist in court. The prosecutor was genuinely stunned (as was I) when my story attracted more media attention than anticipated and gained national headlines.
I think that many people were convinced that sexual abuse in the church had happened in days long gone. My case was recent and so people were surprised to learn that the issue was still present. There have certainly been fewer, new cases in recent years but the sad fact is that most abuse victims don’t come forward right away – years often go by before a victim comes forward and many never come forward at all.
The only reason I came forward a year later was because I found myself unable to bear the burden of, not only the sexual abuse I had suffered, but also the trauma of losing my oldest brother who died unexpectedly from a heart condition.
In 2002, everyone was scrambling to figure out “what went wrong” and to put new programs in place to ensure the safety of children. Here we are almost 20 years later and the long-hidden cases of sexual abuse within the Catholic Church are still coming to light. The Pennsylvania Grand Jury Report released last summer sent us reeling once again as we learned of the horrors of sexual abuse of children and we’ve heard similar stories out of California, Chicago, Oregon, New York and many other place. Let’s not forget, I’m just talking about the child victims. I haven’t even broached the subject of the sexual abuse of adults, seminarians, abuse of nuns, abuse by nuns, etc.
A cancer has grown and festered in the darkness and the silence. I think what has particularly blindsided so many of us is, not just the abuse alone, but the fact that so many priests and bishops have continued to cover it up. There was a time when sexual abuse wasn’t truly understood, it wasn’t discussed openly, and the accepted way to handle a predator was to maybe move him/her away from the victim or even get him/her some counseling.
Problem solved! Right?
Clearly, the church’s handling of abuse cases was severely flawed but, while one can make the excuse that “it was just the way things were handled at the time,” one would hope that we’ve come a long way since the days when children were to be “seen and not heard.” Have we, though?
Keep reading at FaithHakesley.com.
If you’d like to ask Faith a question, please email her at AskASurvivor@ruthinstitute.org.
